Everyday I learn more about myself: what I'm like, what I can do, who I am~
Something new that I've just realized is that.. I can let go of things quite easily.
Is that a good thing? Or a bad thing?
Well, I think I've developed this personality because I had to. Everyone has things that they had to leave behind.
Expectation can bring disappointment, and so I just don't think about it. And over time, the more I don't think about something, the less losing is affects me~

Thinking from an outside perspective, if someone lets go of something easily, does it mean that it didn't mean that much to them in the first place..? Maybe under different circumstances, but not this one.
My phone means such a lot to me that if I actually get absorbed into the fact that I can't have anything from it back, I'll just keep thinking about the "what ifs" and "if onlys". No point in getting upset over something that was your own fault and already done. Just learn from it and be wiser in the future~

I just read his recent blogs. I didn't realise that he'd been writing on here that much. It was like reading a teenage novel, the sort I used to love when I was back at secondary school. I liked reading about the problems that teenagers had and imagined myself in their shoes. This one, however, is reality..

I'm asking myself, how are you feeling now? Especially after last night. That was the second time. How many people in the world could say that someone would kill themselves for them? So how do I feel? . . . I feel nothing.

Life goes on. The world isn't going to stop turning if you decide to stop walking with it. Everyone else's lives will still go on. I'm not going to get left behind. Back when I was in my adolescence, I was a fighter. I would never let my emotions out to anyone, because tears show weakness and I'm not weak. Reading through his blogs, I only cried at one part, and that was at the word Yinnie.

How dare he abuse that word. How dare he say that I've forgotten her. I was with her from beginning to end. Where was he?! I truly forgave him for not being there. The day I wore a brave face by myself, with a feeling of emptiness inside. I can still picture the waiting room, and hear the nurse call my name. It haunts me inside. I push it as far back as I can, and it still resurfaces itself. Of course he can just freely talk about her without the feeling of guilt or self-loathing. He didn't have to do a thing. I was the one who did it. If anyone should be depressed, it should be ME! But he is not going to pull me down with him!!